Not Another Burrito!

Please Tell Me There is More to Mexican Cuisine Than This….
Where are the high-end Mexican restaurants? I have, for better or worse, become somewhat of an expert on the burrito offerings of San Francisco. Back in the day it was the only meal I could find that was in the $3 price range and was always more than I could eat. I have fond memories of Pancho Villa on 16th. The place always had a huge line and there was a uniformed security guard at the door. I always found this amusing because the only other place where there is a security guard at an establishment that I like is the Me & Ro Jewelry Store on Elizabeth Street in Manhattan. You walk into Me & Ro and the first person you meet is a very kind and very large black man in a suit with dark sunglasses. Past him and behind display cases shimmering with silver, gold and platinum are the pretty and substantially smaller sales people. Sure, I get it. There are criminals out there who might consider a ‘smash and grab.’ The menacing security dude is there to remind them that stealing is not only wrong, it will get your ass beat. So, security guards at jewelry stores make sense. In Hong Kong these guys were generally Sikh’s and they all had shotguns. I guess it takes a bit more to remind the Hong Kong shopper that payment is strictly cash or credit card… So, security at a taqueria? This still makes me smile. I wait in line. I order. I grab that burrito and bag of chips, load up on salsa and freshly sliced white onions and cilantro and race out the door? Hmm… It is a cash business. Perhaps it is armed robbery they prevent with these burrito guards. But everything there costs under five bucks. What do you get when you rob the till? $5,000 in singles? Probably. You would need a pillowcase to make good your escape.
So, I have been eating at Mexican restaurants all over the Bay Area for well over a couple of decades now. People who travel frequently to Mexico assure me that “these places are not authentic.” OK. I believe them because the tenpura in America is as similar to the real version in Japan as an octopus is to a wildebeest. Sure. I am told “In Mexico a burrito never has rice and beans in it.” Perhaps this is true. What I want to know is pretty simple based on my experience eating at these non-authentic places in the U.S. Where is the high-end Mexican fare? There has to be more to it than fast food. I can only hope that Vicente Fox and his wife take the bullet proof limo out to a sweet little white table cloth place that makes authentic food so damn good it would make me weep. If only I knew how to find food like this in America. Hey, maybe there isn’t any. I am OK with that. There certainly isn’t any decent tenpura in this country. The only real sushi that I’ve had in America is at Kurumazushi on 47th in Manhattan. (For the record I am open to being proven wrong here. Really. But let’s be clear on this: Real sushi is not made with cream cheese and macadamia nuts)
So, my gentle readers I offer you a challenge. Prove me wrong. This is the official challenge: Find me an incredible Mexican Restaurant someplace in the Bay Area. I am talking authentic. I am talking nice. Really nice. No plastic forks. No wax paper cups of Horchata. I want something that is region specific. Food that is authentic and hails from a place in Mexico that it like the Tuscany of Mexico. I want that place to be a reasonable driving distance from the Santa Cruz Mountains. By this I mean I need to be able to get there and back within the requisite 1.5 hours that it takes to get me to S.F.


I want an exceptional Mexican dinner! Help me find it.